Elton  John says that he can’t watch the footage featuring him performing with John Lennon in his current Las Vegas show, according to Gigwise.com. During Elton’s performance of his 1982 Lennon tribute “Empty Garden (Hey, Hey, Johnny),” the screens flash the only known footage of the pair performing on Thanksgiving night — November 28th, 1974.

Elton revealed to Entertainment Weekly: “I don’t look back when I’m playing that song — if I see the footage of John, I get choked up and it’s too hard to get through the song. I miss him so much. He was a force of nature, and you don’t get many of those. And you sure as hell miss them when they leave.” In addition to the fan-shot Super 8 footage of Elton and Lennon, the nightly tribute features rare and never-before-seen photos of the pair.